"If a woman has [the right to abortion], why shouldn’t a man be free to use his superior strength to force himself on a woman? At least the rapist’s pursuit of sexual freedom doesn’t result in anyone’s death."
-Something Maine lawmaker Lawrence Lockman actually said
if anyone ever calls you a slut just say ‘and yet i still won’t fuck you’ and then blow them a kiss as you saunter away because that’s the closest they’re ever gonna get to your magnificence, o smaug, chiefest and greatest of calamaties
I burned like 3/4 of my forearm on the oven while I was making chicken and my mom was like “honey put some butter on it it draws the heat out” so she was rubbing a stick of butter on my arm and my stepdad was like “what’s for dinner” as he walked in and saw her slathering my arm in butter and he just slowly backed away
james sirius potter going to hogwarts and totally using his dad as an excuse to get away with all sorts of shit because excuse me was it your dad who defeated voldemort and he tries it once in herbology and neville is like excuse me was it you who told voldemort to fuck himself and killed his snake with a legendary sword while your dad took a nap yeah i didn’t think so now do your damn homework